Sunday, June 20, 2010

Reflections

No photos, no images, just raw emotion.Over the last few years I have seen and felt myself learn and grow. As a wife, mother, friend, daughter, sister-in-law, daughter-in-law, and as a child of God. I have had many struggles and still fall back into them. (Don't ask Mike what they are cuz he won't tell you). However for the last few weeks I can feel my heart changing. And it feels weird to tell everyone who might be reading our blog. I don't think it's that many but sharing is still sharing.

I have recently been called to be a vising teacher supervisor. It's small cookies in this big jar. But I feel that my Heavenly Father knows what and how he can help me grow. I have had some struggles with my shyness. It takes extreme force usually by Mike to help me not be a wall flower. I feel that some of my guard comes from my past relationships and choices I have made....and some from having a child with Autism. I feel in order to protect him from the cruelty of uneducated people I have to keep my guard up until I can trust you. ( I just thought of that right now) .However lately I have been trying to meet some women/people in our ward. All have been very nice to me. I actually have agreed to attend a weekly playgroup. But over the last few years I have become accustom to being private. Sharing my gifts, talents, and ideas with only a select few.

But now I feel that I was meant to share what I hold with others. I know God asks his children to share their talents...but it's easier said than done. I know it will take me some time to open up even more to people. But I want to share that I am an interesting person. I love to create...might it be with cakes, crafts, dance or art. ( I actually got an art scholarship for college many eons ago) That Mike,who is the most interesting person I have ever known, didn't marry a lump on a log. Some might not understand what he sees in me. Honestly I feel the same way but whatever it is I am very glad he sees it.

So I want to make this my first step. My first reflection. If you would like to leave a comment feel free. If not that's ok...I did this more for me.
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