Friday, January 15, 2016

3 weeks

It's been 3 weeks since I broke my back and our lives have been interesting.

The first two weeks were rough emotionally, physically, and spiritually. Since I couldn't go down our house stairs Mason let me take over his room since his room is on the top floor where the kids bathroom and kitchen are. But this got boring really fast. I was all by myself while everyone was in the living room. So Mike brought the bed out to the living room so I wouldn't be lonely. This helped me so much not get depressed. So for those 2 weeks I watched every Redbox movie PG-13 or lower. Read a book. (A real book). Started a journal. And done a lot of online shopping. 

-Groceries via Amazon. Toliet paper being delivered to our door is the best thing Amazon could have done for us.
-Found my birthday gift (a jacket) that I can't wear until I'm out of my brace. 

-Purchased a free dress thanks to kmart points.

-Ordered a free photo book of my instagrams.

- Oh and I finally had the time to order masons bedding. Poor kid has had a queen size bed since last summer and has not had a sheet for his bed. So I found a great manly comforter and sheet set from Target. 

Mike has worked himself exhausted. He has fixed the dryer, ceiling fan, washer, did an oil change, cooked 7 dinners, opened the door 14 times for the relief society's dinners, submitted school papers, worked a 40 hour week, took all 4 kids to church, played with our kids, did laundry, hung up our clothes, and served me all the while while I watched Drop Dead Diva. 

And still had time and energy to make me laugh. He invented walker exercise. 

He's such a champ while I'm such a chump. He tells me to be easy on myself and I try but sometimes it's hard.

Our kids are so sweet and helpful. They don't mind going up and down our stairs dozen of times when I forget something on another level of the house.

They have read to me so many stories when I was in so much pain that I needed a distraction. Lily particularly has loved reading me Stuart little. 

They helped mike get a good nights sleep. Since he has had so much on his plate he's walking exhausted. And since I was stuck in bed he tried to sleep next to me but was so scared he'd touch my back that he'd sleep on the couch. 

He hates the couch. 

So our kids each volunteered to sleep on the couch to help me if I needed assistance during the night. Either with something I needed ie water, pills or just to wake up mike. They figured out the schedule which really helped mike get a good nights sleep. 
Plus it was nice to spend some one on one time with each kid watching a movie, talking or listening to them make up a story. 

So fast forward to the end of last week. I started to feel much better. I started walking around the top floor of our house without a walker. I sat up in bed without assistance. I could put my brace on myself. I cooked ramen for my kids. Plus Mike put Mason's bed back in his room and I started walking slowly downstairs to our room. It's so nice to sleep in my nice king size pillowtop bed again. 

I went to the doctors monday and he says my back looks great for being broken. That it looks exactly how it did on Christmas Eve. I admit I was expecting more than this. Since I've been feeling better I thought that he'd say my back is almost done healing. Wrong! 
So this set me back mentally. But my doctor says that my broke bone pieces are all in the right places so when they do "glue" back things will be in the right spot. I know he's just trying to give me a silver lining... I guess I'll just take it.

So I'm back to sitting or laying down. Staying in the brace all day long. But I have taken small steps in gaining my independence back. I can shower myself. Walk up and down the stairs. Cook. Get dress. Go to the bathroom myself. 
Granted I'm slow.... Like really slow but that's ok. I'm happy I'm doing it.

I even went shopping. I was going crazy being in this house so mike took me to target to get groceries. I drove one of those motorized carts which was fun but dangerous. I kept crashing into things likes carts, shelves, etc that i came home in more pain than usual. 

My latest goal is to get off my pain medicine. My doctor prescribed me Percocet for pain. But knowing how additive these pills are I want to get off of them ASAP. Plus once I'm off of them I can drive again. So I use to take 1
pill every 4 hours. Then moved it to 1 pill every 6 hours. I'm at half a pill every 8 hours. But since I'm still in lots of pain I'm taking Tylenol to help. And it does help a lot so I'm thinking my goal of being completely off Percocet will be soon. But I noticed one day when I didn't take any Percocet that I got the jitters. I'm not sure if it's a side effect from the drug or from withdraw but that day freaked me out. Mike says it's withdraw. He's seen and experienced it before so it's best to just keeping cutting my pills smaller and smaller so my body is still getting the pain medication but that I wean off of them slowly instead of cold turkey like I'm use to. ( I don't have an additive personally so when I quit something I just stop... But not these- my body got hooked.) 

This is where I'm at:
wake up in pain. Everyday. 

I take my Tylenol and wait for it to kick in so I lay in bed for a little bit longer. Usually with Ducati since everyone else is stil asleep.

I get dress in leggings and tees because that's the only thing comfortable right now.

I smile and laugh with my kids. 

I write in my journal.

I watch my kids do their chores.

I pin the crap out of Pinterest. 

I make lunch for my kids. Hot pockets thanks to Smiths 99 cent sale.

I text mike while he's at work letting him know I'm good so he's not wondering how I'm doing.

I teach my kids the difference between hail and sleet.

I read a few motivational quotes to help me get past the pain.

I read a story to Ducati. 

I quiz Hailey on her multiplication. 

I cheat on the quiz with my phone calculator since I can't remember my 12's.

I grade Mason's rough draft of his personal narrative. 

I kick myself for not paying more attention to my sons point of view.

I count the minutes to my next tylenol. 

I count the minutes til mike will be home.

I get my hug after everyone else rushes to him since I sit and wait on the couch for him to reach me.

I thank him for his compliment on how I look great in my newest combo of tees/leggings.

He makes tacos or French toast since this is all he knows how to cook.

I'm in pain from walking around earlier that morning. 

The brace is bugging me so much I losen it for a minute before mike stares at me and I refasten it. 

We read scriptures as a family. 

Our kids take showers while Mike and I watch an episode of The Office on Netflix.

Everyone kneels while I sit on our couch to say our good night prayers.

I want a new couch at this point from making butt prints in it all day. 

I dislike this but it's where I am right now. But I know I can do hard things so I will.